An Ode to My Beautiful, Beautiful Boy

I alternate between being irritated by my son Zach’s smart alecky ways and being astonished at how incredibly sweet he is. He tells terrible knock-knock jokes, and he’s old enough now to know that they’re terrible, which makes him laugh even harder. He’s at the stage of being a smartass by taking everything literally. “Wait a second? Time’s up! You said, ‘a second!’” It reads much funnier than it sounds when he does this while his sister Kaylee is screaming about yet. another. thing.

He gets frustrated with his sister, especially when she’s messing up whatever he’s playing with, which is often, but he rarely hits or pushes her. More often than not, he’s actually quite kind to her.

Zach with cut on his eyebrow

Zach tripped and cut his eyebrow once. Taught him to say, “You should see the other guy!”

I’m a little sad that their relationship dynamic is usually him giving in and letting her have her way. I allow it for now because she’s 3.5, and he’s 6.5. I intend to make it fairer as she gets older, but I think he’s really taken to heart my many monologues and diatribes about how it’s our responsibility to take care of each other.

I am proud of and a little embarrassed by his overwhelming goodness. I’m embarrassed because he’s a much better person than I am. He’ll tell me he can’t have a chocolate chip cookie in the afternoon because he already had a cupcake at school. This year he found out the truth about the Tooth Fairy and Santa, but says he’ll continue to pretend for Kaylee’s sake. He’s really eager to help me fold laundry and carry groceries. He really enjoyed setting up his own account and lending money to two men in Texas, one with a tire shop and the other with a window-cleaning business.

Amber Dusick, the blogger behind Illustrated with Crappy Pictures, once suggested we bloggers interview our kids about us. Here is what Zach said about me.

Me: What word do you think of when you think of me?
Zach: “I love you,” because you tell me that all the time.

Me: What do you want to say about me?
Zach: I like all those photos that you took [I had let him look at Facebook photos earlier], especially when you gave the phone to someone else, and we were all in the photo.

Me: What do you not like about me?
Zach: When you get angry.
Me: Yeah, I don’t like that part of me either. I’m working on it.

Me: What’s the funniest or silliest thing that I do?
Zach: That’s hard to choose. When you do this (puffs out his cheeks, presses his hands against his cheeks, then blows all the air in my face).

Me: If you wrote a book about me, what would you call it?
Zach: The Greatest Mommy [that made me a little weepy]

Zach often tells me that he loves me. When I ask him why, he says because I’m his mom. Recently, I asked him, “If I weren’t your mom, would you still love me?” and he said, “Yes.” When I asked why, he said, “Because you take me to fun places, and you’re silly.”

Zach and me

Me and my beautiful, beautiful boy

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